What a year 2020 was, I know many of us have struggled with having to deal with what has happened around us. I find it hard to express myself and I don’t give much away, but I felt that this is the right time to share a little bit about my own mental health story. I hope by doing this, it’ll normalize talking about mental health and encourage someone to speak up about how they feel.
Back in 2012, I had one of the worst years of my life. I struggled with becoming increasingly isolated at school (for several reasons), and from the pressures of a family situation at home. I experienced anxiety and depression but I didn’t recognize this immediately and therefore didn’t receive the help I needed. It started with being singled out and bullied, which happens to most students in schools, but it got so bad that I felt isolated and dreaded attending school. That’s when things got tricky and started to spiral out of control.
Transitioning from school into college was super difficult and I couldn’t manage it. By this point, I had developed IBS because of my crippling anxiety which caused me to be scared to leave the house. I had no support and no choice but to drop out. My friends and first boyfriend slowly walked away also which caused an emotional breakdown. I stayed in bed for two months straight. I didn’t see the point in anything—I felt like a failure and believed that no one cared. Ultimately, I didn’t want to be here anymore; no hope, no motivation, no future.